


30 Days of Rosemary

by orphan_account



Category: Homestuck
Genre: (bg davekat and other f/f ships probably), 30 Day OTP Challenge, Background Relationships, F/F, RoseKan - Freeform, rosemary
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-06-13
Updated: 2018-06-18
Packaged: 2019-05-21 19:57:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,737
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14921870
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: yeah i just love these girls a lot lol





	1. Getting Lost Together

**Author's Note:**

> rose and kanaya get lost on their way to a camping trip. sap ensues.

“rose, are you sure you know what you’re doing?” kanaya asked gently.

“yes, kanaya, i lived on earth for a good thirteen years, i know how to navigate this place.” 

the couple was supposed to be meeting up with their friends for a camping trip in celebration of the ten year anniversary of them winning the game. kanaya, who was the tiniest bit squeamish of the great outdoors insisted that they back their entire bed set and bring a mattress in addition to the tent they brought in favor of resting in separate sleeping bags, which put them a bit behind schedule, but it nothing that they couldn’t handle.

the problem, you see, was that rose always insisted on taking the backroads every time they went somewhere. she called it “the scenic route,” meaning that kanaya got to look at a lot of trees. she understood rose, though. what she wouldn’t give to bask in the familiarity of alternia’s sun. the woods were rose’s home, it only made sense for her to want to be in them as much as possible. if only she didn’t get lost every time.

“karkat’s worried,” kanaya said. “he keeps texting me. he thinks we’re lost.” rose’s grip on the steering wheel tightened.

“well,” she said, hesitantly. “maybe... we are.. lost?”

kanaya smacked her forehead. of course. rose grabbed her hand reassuringly and rubbed soothing circles into her wrist. she gave an apologetic smile.

“hey, it’s going to be okay. we’ll drive around for a little bit longer, and then we can either end up at camp or ask someone for directions, okay?” kanaya sighed.

“fine,” she said tightly. rose raised her eyebrows at her and poked her side, grinning. kanaya giggled and pushed her hand away. “yes, yes okay!” rose laughed and looked back at the road.

“i love you,” she said.

“i love you too.” 

————————————————

it was dark, they still weren’t at camp, and kanaya was starving. 

“rose, if we don’t stop to eat soon i’m going to resort to drinking your blood,” she said.

“that’s hot,” rose joked. kanaya huffed at her. “hey, easy, girl. we went through a town a few minutes ago while you were napping. i’m sure they have a restaurant there.”

“why didn’t you stop then?!” 

“because you were too beautiful to wake up,” rose teased. 

“rose,” kanaya warned (although she couldn’t deny the green blush that dusted her cheeks).

“okay, i’m sorry,” she said, turning around. “i could use a break from driving, if i’m being honest. you wanna check in at a hotel for the night?” 

“that’s the best thing you’ve said all day,” kanaya said, eagerly.

“perfect. would you mind texting karkat and telling him we might be a little bit later than we thought?”

————————————————

‘Not Going To Make It Until Tomorrow. Rose Got Turned Around, We’re Going To Check In At A Hotel. See You Tomorrow. - Kanaya <3’

“what’s the news?” dave said from the fireplace. karkat quickly typed a response back to his moirail before turning to face dave.

“your sister,” he said, gesturing to dave, dirk, and roxy. “is an idiot.”

“get laid,” dave said, flipping off his boyfriend. his tone was light, though. roxy frowned.

“rose can’t help getting lost. she’s too prideful to use a map.” dirk sighed and shook his head.

“not to mention that superiority complex,” he said darkly. the other strilondes nodded grimly before bursting out into laughter.

“dear lord,” karkat said, pinching his nose. “you’re an entire family of idiots!” dave snorted.

————————————————

“honestly, i’m kind of glad we didn’t make it for the first night,” rose said, stroking kanaya’s arm. “karkat’s gonna be an absolute monster in the morning before he adjusts to the lack of coffee.”

“yes,” kanaya said. “maybe it’s better off like this. even if you did get us lost.”

“you don’t mind at all,” rose said. “in fact, you love this, huh?”

“i love YOU,” kanaya said. “so that excuses all of your questionable decision-making skills.”

“you snarky woman,” rose said, cuddling into her wife’s chest. she yawned. “i’m going to sleep. i love you,” she said.

“i love you too.” 

————————————————

“so nice of you to show up,” dave said over his glass of water. his hair was a mess and his glasses were on crooked. rose stifled a laugh. 

“for your information, david, it was not my decision to come here. in fact, if i remember correctly, it was you who suggested we have a ‘bonding experience of some sort.’ isn’t that right?” kanaya pointed out. dave grinned

“hey, watch it, troll. these dudes are just looking for somebody to hate. i don’t want to be the first one people eat when we run out of food.” rose blinked.

“oh! speaking of which, kanaya and i went grocery shopping.”

“tell me you bought coffee,” karkat mumbled, his face pressed into dave’s shoulder. 

“yes, we predicted you would be experiencing withdrawals,” kanaya said. karkat perked up.

“oh wow. you should get lost more often, rose,” he said.

“no!” kanaya shouted.


	2. Petnames

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> rose wants to get back at her new girlfriend for constantly using cutesy petnames to get her way. baby gays in space ft. a very unhelful vriska and a typical strilonde sibling dynamic

DAY TWO: pet names

it happens when they’re playing a game. 

karkat insists on game night along with movie night, because a proper routine is the key to not going insane while you’re literally lying in wait on a giant rock floating through space. everyone pretends to hate it, but it works enough for them to keep participating.

“it’s called ‘heads up,’” karkat said. “dave spent a whole hour explaining how to play to me, so i’m going to give you the brief version while he hands out the set that we made together.”

karkat rambled on about the rules and instructions while everybody applied their headbands and fasted their respective cards to their foreheads. the group looked around at each other and giggled. kanaya had a baby and a wriggler on her card (most likely at karkat’s request, not everyone knew as much about human culture as he did after so graciously researching it, and he was annoyingly considerate about it), terezi had a carrot, vriska had a rabbit, dave had a peanut butter sandwich, rose had a door, and karkat had a pencil. 

“am i alive?” karkat asked.

“no,” dave said.

“can i move?” vriska asked.

“yes,” kanaya said.

“i can’t see,” terezi said.

“shoot,” karkat said. “okay, listen up. we have a blind player on our team-“ terezi raised her hand, grinning. “-yes, it’s you, terezi; so we’re going to have to tell her who has what on their cards. i’ll tell her everyone else’s, and then vriska can tell her mine.” 

after they got the situation settled, things started to go smoothly. vriska guessed her card first, then terezi, then rose. 

then it happened.

“am i small?” kanaya asked.

“yes,” karkat said.

“baby?” kanaya asked. rose made a confused face and then smiled a little bit.

“yes, dear?” she said.

“the card,” kanaya said. “is it ‘baby?’” karkat gave rose a confused look before congratulating kanaya on her win and handing her another card.

rose was flustered, but she realized that none of the trolls would pick up on her mistake. she and kanaya had only been together for a few weeks, she should have known they weren’t at the sappy names stage yet. she looked around the circle and was met with faces that were either bored, immersed in the game, karkat, and- 

-a stupidly knowing grin.

of course her brother would know. how STUPID of her. he’d never let her live this down. he was always the one messing up, and she gave him hell for it. it was his turn.

“hey rose,” vriska said. “why did you act so weird when kanaya guessed her card?”

“yeah, rose,” dave said, leaning back. “what is up with THAT?” 

“did you act weird?” kanaya asked, turning to her girlfriend. “i didn’t notice any abnormal behavior.”

“no, it wasn’t- i’m FINE, i just though that you...” her face was practically glowing red. “i just thought you called me baby,” she blurted out. “no big deal.”

“why would kanaya make fun of you? you’re her matesprit,” karkat pointed out. dave snorted.

“this is rich,” he mouthed to rose.

“shut up,” she said out loud. “in human culture... calling your.. er, significant other ‘baby’ is a.. uh, term of endearment.”

“oh!” kanaya exclaimed. “i hope i didn’t make you uncomfortable! i was just guessing my card!”

“don’t worry, kanaya,” dave said. “she wasn’t uncomfortable at all. she probably wants you to call her baby all the time now. forget about ‘rose.’ ‘rose’ is gone. to you, it’s just baby from here on-“

“i am literally going to murder you,” rose said. oh boy, if looks could kill.

“well,” kanaya said, clearing her throat. “if you’d like me to call you baby, i wouldn’t mind.” 

rose groaned and buried her face in her hands. everyone stared at her. she stayed like that for a minute before looking up and shyly nodding at kanaya.

————————————————

from that moment on, it became a THING. a bribery, almost. blackmail. 

“rose, could you get me a cup of tea?” kanaya would ask. “i’m reading, and i don’t want to pause.”

“well, i’m knitting,” rose would counter. “just read the next paragraph and then go get your tea.” kanaya would look up at her girlfriend from the floor where she sat with wide eyes and pout.

“baby,” she’d say, and rose would stiffen up. “please?”

it would take a moment, but eventually, rose would stand up and get kanaya a cup of tea with extra sugar, just how she liked it.

“thank you, baby,” kanaya would say, smiling, before kissing rose’s hand. the shorter girl would grumble and blush in response.

“one day, that won’t work on me,” she’d insist every time, without fail.

“mm,” kanaya would hum, and go back to reading her book.

rose was going to kill her brother.

————————————————

“it wasn’t like that with us!” vriska insisted. “i was too busy dealing with my unreciprocated pitch feelings for her to come up with cutesy nicknames!” rose rolled her eyes.

“c’mon, serket. throw me a bone here. there’s got to be SOMETHING, right?” vriska huffed, taking another one of rose’s bribery cookies. she made them special for this occasion.

“there isn’t,” vriska said.

“well, what about porrim? you knew her for a bit, right? maybe they share similar preferences to nicknames.” vriska stared at rose like she was the dumbest person who ever dared to breathe.

“no, you dimwit, i didn’t know porrim. in fact, i never even MET any of the alpha trolls in this timeline.” she paused. “some other version of me lowered her standards enough to allow meenah peixes to fill my flushed quadrant, though. what a freaking trainwreck.” she bit down into her cookie. “i’ve got nothing.”

“you remember that timeline, though, right?” rose asked. “maybe you and meenah talked about porrim.” vriska rolled her eyes and flopped backwards onto her bed.

“...yes,” she finally said. “i remember talking to the fish girl about porrim. there! are you happy?” rose clicked her tongue.

“i’m not leaving until i get an answer,” she said. 

“ugh! i don’t have anything!” vriska huffed. “try... calling her ‘love’ or ‘sugar’ or something. she’s not going to be into the normal human terms.”

“as if you know anything about human terms,” rose retorted.

“for your information, lalonde, i was romantically involved with egghead at one time. so i’d say i know plenty,” she said, proudly.

“it’s egbert,” rose corrected her. vriska sneered at her.

“you got your answer. get out.”

————————————————

rose had thought of the perfect pet name, and she couldn’t wait to use it. this was going to be so good.

“rose, could you hand me a needle?” kanaya asked, spool of thread placed carefully in her mouth. rose raised her eyebrows.

“you’re closer,” she pointed out. it was true, kanaya’s sewing kit was right by her feet, and rose was sitting across the room. not that this mattered, she had another plan in mind. also, kanaya’s project would fall apart if she let go of it. rose may be criminally genius, but she wasn’t a jerk.

“baby-“

“you know you can call me that outside of you trying- and succeeding; to persuade me to do things for you, right?” rose said, standing up. she smoothly walked over to the kit, carefully picked out a needle, and handed it to kanaya. the jadeblood was obviously shocked at her girlfriend’s sudden lack of stubbornness, but declined to make any comment on it.

“thank you,” she said. rose leaned down and kissed her directly on the lips. she felt kanaya’s face literally radiate heat and smirked at the realization that this was her rainbowdrinker’s glow. 

“anything for you,” rose stood up. “doll.” 

she walked back to her chair, picked up her book, and excused herself from the living room. score! one point for team lalonde!

it wasn’t much compared to kanaya’s twenty, but she was just getting started.


	3. Patching Each Other Up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> rose gets beat up and kanaya helps her out. tw for pretty explicit homophobic violence

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SORRY FOR MISSING THE LAST COUPLE DAYS AHH

rose winced when the needle first punctured her skin. she lowered her hand with the ice pack in it and gripped kanaya’s shoulder. the taller girl shushed her gently and pushed her off.

“i’m sorry, but we don’t have anything that could numb you. keep the ice pack on your eye, please.” rose sighed and nodded, gently placing the cool pack on her black eye. “you could have gotten away without hurting that man, rosie.”

“he deserved it,” rose said. “besides, it was sheer luck that i caught a pressure point. i can’t believe he would say those things. i mean, we’re adults now. aren’t we all supposed to be mature?” 

“some people are just old fashioned,” kanaya said, pulling the needle through her skin again. rose gasped. “sorry.”

“no need to apologize. you weren’t the one you tried to stab me.” kanaya nodded. “i didn’t know people still used the term ‘dyke’ in a threatening context anymore.”

“life is full of surprises,” kanaya said, pulling the last stitch through. she cut the thread and smiled at her girlfriend. “there. all fixed up.”

rose frowned and squinted at kanaya. the corner of her lip was swollen and bruised, and she swore she could see and little bit of dried blood. the ice pack dropped, and her hands went to kanaya’s face, brushing gently over the wound.

“he got you?” rose whispered. kanaya shrugged, smiling tightly.

“it’s no big deal. just a punch. i was a lot stronger than him.” she laughed half-heartedly. “in his defense, it probably hurt while i was trying to get him off of you.”

“don’t defend him,” rose said, tone serious. “especially not for that. he got out with a couple of pains in his shoulders and irritation behind his ears.” she held up her hand in display, showing off her long fingernails. “we got out with a split lip, black eye, and three stitches.”

“four, actually,” kanaya said, weakly. “i’m worried about you. should we get you to a hospital?”

“we can’t afford that,” rose admitted. she leaned in, grinning. “plus, i already have my own personal nurse living with me.”

“oh, stop it,” kanaya said, blushing. “i’m not a nurse yet. i haven’t even finished up my first year.”

“you’re excellent,” rose said, pecking her forehead. “let me fix it?” kanaya self consciously touched her lip.

“it’s really not a big deal,” she said. “it just needs to be cleaned and iced.” rose tutted.

“then let me clean and ice it,” she insisted. “you’d do the same thing for me.” kanaya shifted nervously but eventually nodded.

the cotton ball drenched in hydrogen peroxide stung her open wound, but she made it through with minimal wincing. after the cut was clean, rose got her a plastic baggy filled with crushed ice, wrapped in a rag. kanaya chuckled.

“i’ve taught you well,” she said. 

“hey, i know a few things on my own,” rose said. “listen, i don’t really feel like going out again to buy food. you want to order a pizza or something and binge watch feel-good shows?” 

“is that going to help us?” kanaya asked, smiling gently. 

“speaking from a psychological point of view, avoiding stress head-on is only an issue if it will cause you more stress in the end.” she yawned. “speaking from MY point of view, i’m tired, sore, and i want to rewatch friends for the fourth time.”

kanaya smiled lightly and nodded.

“that sounds nice.”


End file.
